Tag Archives: humor

Perceived Privacy

Perceived Privacy

Over the past year I’ve followed a blog called Raptitude. David, the author of the blog, publishes a new article on the average of about 1 every week or so. Almost as soon as he posts a new article I’ve found myself eagerly waiting with anticipation for his next bit of genius to post to my Pulse reader. I have a few favorites that really resonated with me. Some have even changed the way I tend to view and even interact with the world. I will add links to my favorite Raptitude articles at the end of this post for anyone interested.

Today I was pleased to find my Pulse reader had a new Raptitude article, of which I quickly devoured every word. It is again an article that delivers insight and perspective on the day to day happenings of a large part of the human race that is an interesting perspective to say the least. I hope you read it as well as take some time to dig around the Raptitude website, as there is sure to be something that everyone can relate to and enjoy reading.

 

You are a public figure

New Year’s Eve, for the first time, I had an alarming moment when I realized spaceships really were watching me through the ceiling. They knew where I was in the house. I was troubled by it and said so to my friend, but by midnight I forgot, and felt much better.

Rewind a week or two. I was taking adorable pictures of my toddler nephew typing on his grandmother’s iPad, when I had one of those bewildering, revelatory moments.

I realized I was photographing a member of the first generation that will be able to revisit its entire life in sparkling, high resolution. Between me, his parents and his grandmother, there are easily more photos of him than there have been days in his life.

His brother is six months now. In 2081, when they’re both old men, they’ll be able to access their childhood in extraordinary detail. They’ll see their first Christmases, their first bike rides, their graduations and wedding days all in high resolution images and HD video, and it might seem strange to them that previous generations did not have much access at all to their pasts, aside from memories and a few grainy photographs.

Contrast that with my father, (1947-2008) of whom I’ve only seen one or two pictures of as a child. In those pictures he’s someone I don’t know. He has a smooth sepia face that could belong to just about anyone except my dad. He wore a moustache from the day I was born to the day he died and I couldn’t recognize my father in any other face.

The kids born after about 2007 constitute the first generation that’s younger than Facebook. Today, it’s fairly normal for human beings make their first appearance on the internet when they are less than a week old. Think of how many newborn photos you’ve seen posted by your Facebook friends this last year.

(Read More…)

 

David also sites this article  which was written by a fellow wordpresser about 4 years ago. What then seemed kinda Jetsons-esque then, now is very close to reality. Interesting.

Here are some of my favorite Raptitude articles:

What we refer to as happiness is really just what the absence of suffering feels like.

 

Defeated, I stood on the mat and let the cold air flood over me. I watched the ice fog pour over the sill like freezing smoke. I just let it have its way with me. I didn’t get mad at it, I didn’t shiver or scramble to dry off. I just let it feel like whatever it was going to feel like, and noticed something peculiar.

It didn’t hurt me.

Life is uncertain by its very nature.  Except for this:No matter what is happening right now,
It will never happen again.

Why should *I* be forced to help someone else?

Here’s why:

Because you’re better off if other people aren’t suffering so much.

life is the present only. The past is thoughts in the present. The future is thoughts in the present. You can argue all you want that the past “existed”, but the notion of something having existed is also just a thought in the present.

 

 

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GoodPulp: Fathers Fuck up Everything

I love the style of writing by this wordpresser. Its very straight forward, easy to read and sounds kinda like my own inner voice…uncensored.
This blog post struck a chord with me and I figured I would share it. Please check out GoodPulp on wordpress. It will be worth your time.

The Revolver- Look Closer Edition by David from Raptitude

http://www.raptitude.com/2011/07/the-revolver-look-closer-edition/

At the beginning of American Beauty, just as Lester Burnham is beginning is spectacular breakdown, the movie’s tagline can be seen behind him, pinned to the wall of his cubicle. A little white sticker reads, “Look closer.”

Photo by: Senscience
http://www.raptitude.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/roundabout.jpg

Another GREAT Post from David @ Raptitude…

Another GREAT Post from David @ Raptitude…

I can’t say this enough times, Raptitude is an amazing website full of well thought out and elegantly written posts that, if you give yourself the time to read, has the potential to a enhance your quality of time spent on this watery rock called Earth.

I will be sharing a link to his posts often but i encourage anyone who reads this to bookmark Raptitude and subscribe to the rss feed.


photo by: David Cain and the Raptitude website

The link:

The internet allows us to share a brain, sort of. You have an idea, or an understanding, and now it can be anyone’s, with no need to get a  publisher to agree that it’s worth sharing. If that idea changes the way someone lives, that change can change the way someone else lives, and that’s all culture is. Twenty years ago this medium wasn’t a part of our lives, and now we’re influencing each other at an astonishing rate. This is evolution.

http://www.raptitude.com/2011/07/the-revolver/

Update on: Take Me Out…

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https://lilywhitewash.wordpress.com/2011/07/13/take-me-out/

So, I was taken out to dinner tonight. My awesome parents took me and my youngest child out to dinner. My middle child is staying the night with her bff and my oldest couldn’t be bothered to leave the house for food, he was happier placing his order as a “to go” to be brought back to him so he could complete the 111th hour of straight gaming. Lol. It was nice to go out and enjoy dinner with my parents and daughter.
The picture is one of a moth or butterfly on the outside window of the diner. We saw it when we went outside to smoke. My mom noticed it and had me take an up close picture of it. Then she got the idea for the silence of the lambs esque pic. It wasn’t easy to take the picture because i had to do a partial squat to center it over my mouth in the reflection and the move the camera out of my face so it wouldn’t be in the way.
Long story short, a couple ladies squating, smokin cigarettes, laughing and taking pictures into a restaurant window must look awfully weird to the patrons inside.
Today was a good day.

Digital Detention 2011 has finally come to an end

Digital Detention 2011 has finally come to an end. I broke down and got a phone that works in my new spot on planet earth. For a while i wasn’t sure if i was living in some kind of wireless hell or the gods of the interwebs had sent me to digital detention but thats all over now. Im wireless again. THANK GOD!

Insurance Salesmen: Fear the Reaper

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“There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?”

~Woody Allen~

Btw, my husband was an insurance salesman when we first started dating. Lol, where was this ingenious quote then. I sure could have used a bit of Woody Allen wisdom as well as some relationship redirection.

This brings me back to a previous post http://wp.me/p1hqVQ-uZ

The story behind the image:

One crazy and emotion filled night me and my bff were  going through some boxes of my husbands old junk that he never unpacked when we moved into our house. The goal was to sort the junk, trash unecessary crap, condense the keepables and rebox it up labeled.

We get into a pile of some of the stuff he’d kept from his days as an insurance salesman. There where pages and pages and piles of leads (really, why would he keep that crap for 12 years) and pay check stubs.

Then we seen it. Laying there like a treasure of hilarity waiting patiently for the day it would be found and appreciated to the asurdity it was.

WHO THE HELL NEEDS A MINITURE BRIEFCASE!?!?

We laughed for hours, making up and acting out scenarios in which one would use such a small briefcase. Mocking and laughing at the complete rediculousness of our find.

We still laugh about it when we think about it.

http://www.quotationspage.com/quote/489.html

Woody Allen – http://tinyurl.com/2ef474m

The Bold and The Beautiful in 6 minutes.

I can’t decide whether I’m proud or humiliated that I’m able to follow the 6 minute synopsis almost completely. I only watched The Bold and The Beautiful for about 5 years. That last sentence, I’m definately humiliated to reveal.

Text Message Eti-QUIT IT ALREADY!

A Lesson In Text Message Etiquette

A Lesson In Text Message Etiquette

Thank you to writer Lucia Stacey and thoughtcatalog.com for the funny piece that inspired me to rant a bit. Below my own thoughts on the subject, I’ve pasted the article written by Lucia Stacey as well as a link to the article on thoughtcatalog.com.

I have recently experienced a new and much bolder breed of “double down texting bandits” and just commented about this last night to a specific text etiquette faux pas Récidiviste. Don’t worry, said texter only suffered minor bruising to the ego and is certain to recover in no time at all. Don’t worry, said texter only suffered minor bruising to the ego and is certain to recover in no time at all. Sorry about the sentence double down. I sure hope the afore mentioned affliction isn’t contagious.

***** *******: Getting closer to trash nite….
Message Received: 10:48 PM, June 14

***** *******: Getting closer to trash nite….
Message Received: 10:51 PM, June 14

Me: Ya know, I’ve never heard you stut-tut-tut-tutter when ya talk but I’ll be damned if you don’t stutter when ya text.
Message Sent: 10:53 PM, June 14

***** *******: Lol
Message Received: 10:54 PM, June 14

Now, I’m not usually to bitchy when it comes to the text messages I receive. I don’t have the heart to kick every tacky texter in the teeth. This would include almost (but not all) everyone I know. Btw, the worst offenders… are my children.

So I’ve learned to live with it and have found that, during times of mind numbing boredom, deciphering some text-a-tretchification can be entertaining.

I’m familiar with the usual suspects:
1.) Lolz, c u l8r, roflmaoasimp ect…
2.) Yur gunna hafta chry hawrd tu n-turp-wrut tha n-flex-shun uv dis un.
3.) The “Text-a-Turret” who fires of so many texts, and so fast, that you don’t have time to respond to the previous 3 before being pelted with the next round of texts.
4.) The “Oops, sorry I must have texted you by accident, lolz” who will send you a text about something random and completely out of the blue in effort to elicit a response, start a convo, or just generally pique your interest or pluck your nerve. It looks a little like this;
No silly, what would make you think that?
Side note: me and my friends had a list of such random sentences we would use to play a game while bored together. I’ll elaborate on the rules and details we came up with to occupy ourselves in a seperate post.
5.) The “Dooms Day Inspirational Chain Text Sender” who will send you no less than 5 of the longest winded, graphics and sound included, if you don’t reply to me and forward 10 times you’ll die a skank but because I think so highly of you I sent this to you to remind you how great of a person you are. Yes, we all have that friend, and they’re probably websurfing for the next Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw:Fw: Chain text to Blast right now.
6.) The “Slow to never Reply Texter” who has no concept of the Time/Text ratio. (I admit, I’m guilty of this one myself)

Truth be told, I could probably go on forever adding to this list. But I’m sure I have a text or 4 to respond to and this post is about to excede the blog length/attention span ratio.

Reblog from thoughtcatalog.com:

JUNE 15, 2011 By: Lucia Stacey

http://thoughtcatalog.com/2011/a-lesson-in-text-message-etiquette/

To text twice in a row, or not to text twice in a row? It seems I’m asked this at least once a day, during semi-formals week or at the start of a friend’s new relationship maybe 6 times in a day. I can tell you of about a hundred (thousand) or so terrible incidents my friends and I have run into with the dreaded double text, and how it can make you look
a. like a freak
b. completely desperate
c. beyond stupid

So let’s start with some extreme examples.

Example 1: My best friend, let’s call her Lauren (because Lauren Conrad is my dream television best friend and it makes sense to me), had a particularly bad case of the double texts a few months ago. She’d been hooking up with this guy for about five months, but like a lot of the men we seem to come across he was commitment-phobic (or maybe they all know how neurotic we are). It was a typical Friday night –we were all having drinks and bitching about our weeks and preparing ourselves for the madness that would be the rest of our night. Lauren decided to text –let’s call him Adam –and ask if he was headed to the same party that we were headed to. Forty minutes passed, as did three more rounds of drinks and we decided to head down to the party. We arrived at the party but decided to head down to the party. We arrived at the party but Adam wasn’t there. Lauren had another drink and thirty minutes later decided to text him…again, “Wanna meet up later?” She waited another hour or so (2 more drinks), and when still no text was received she decided to send the absolutely forbidden triple text, “Yo, where are you?” [NOTE: never ever ever ever ever do this] Five minutes or so later Adam texted her back: “Headed back to my house with Ashley” (Ashley being the girl he used to hook up with). Let this be a lesson to you all friends. This particular malady was remedied by a late night cheeseburger, four more beers, and an endless tirade of bitching. You don’t want to be the girl pouring your heart out to the drive through attendant at McDonalds (I’m usually that girl and it’s honestly no fun).

Example 2: Another one of my friends sent a booty text to a guy she’d only hooked up with once: “My room? Now?” Two hours later, in a state of embarrassment and bad judgment she sent a follow up, “Or tomorrow?” –No response. Ever. There is hope though (sort of –things didn’t end up working out with this guy…typical) but anyway, here’s a time where the double text resulted in absolute success.

I’d been hooking up with this guy for an entire weekend (basically a lifetime) and I wanted to carry this ‘romance’ on into the coming week. He’d mentioned that his dog was coming to town (yes, to visit him –his mum was bringing the puppy to stay for a couple of days). Around 4 o’clock on Monday (almost 24 hours since I’d last seen or heard from him) I decided I’d send the ever so tempting “bait” text. A “bait” text is when you say something that is supposed to illicit you the response you hoped for and simultaneously tests the guy’s intelligence level and level of interest in you. The most typical example of a “bait” text is, “I’m tired, I need a nap!” Now, if the boy is interested and remotely intelligent it is expected that he will take the bait and respond with, “We could nap together” (NOTE: you cannot send this text too early in the relationship, otherwise if he does get the implication he may freak out –but more about that another time).

So back to my dog-lovin’ lover –I’d decided that it was time to text him (again NOTE: if a guy doesn’t text you for more than 24 hours after a hook up then your actions should be carefully monitored by cynical and objective friends) I was trying to think of bait with which to snag his interest when it came to me, the dog (not literally, obviously). So I sent him what I boastingly told my friends was guaranteed to illicit a response: “How’s spending time with your dog?! Are you happy to see her?”

2 hours passed, then 4 hours. I did the usual: deleted his number, swore I was over the whole thing, realized I wasn’t, Facebook stalked until I found a group he’d joined where someone had dropped their phone in a pool and needed numbers (don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about), got his number from there, and decided to send the dreaded DOUBLE text. At this point, even more time had passed and all hope was lost anyway, so, dignity between my gritted teeth, I sent a second message, “Do I get to meet your puppy?” 5 minutes passed and just as I was getting ready to crack open the emergency bag of ‘feel better’ BBQ chips I keep in my drawer, my phone dinged:

“Yeah, definitely! Want to come spend the night and meet her?”

So, there is one success story of the double text, though I’m pretty sure it’s an anomaly and shouldn’t ever be used as rationale for your own double texts. In general though, double texts are rarely acceptable and ONLY appropriate if:
a. There was a typo that you have to correct from the previous text
b. There was misinformation in the previous text that you need to correct
c. You’re already dating the guy and he doesn’t care
d. You don’t mind throwing your dignity to the wind and gaining five pounds from ‘I need to feel better about my self’ food binges.

Sink Bathing Between Classes

Sink Bathing, not just for the monetarily challenged in gas station bathrooms or those who’ve been differently blessed with Superior stink anymore.

Sink Bathing, the latest in High School Bathroom possibilities.

Cablebox CLOCKtastrophy…

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Ok, I haven’t watched tv in over a year. My ever so generous husband recently decided that the cable/internet/phone service was a luxury my children were undeserving of. So, instead of the service being turned of for a few days then turned back on, this time its turned of for good.


Its not that big of an issue because I’m trying to purge my life, heart and mind of him. All of our bills were in his name which limited my ability to pay the bills (because they are forwarded to his po box) or even know when they were due.

The cancellation of the services is a good thing. It means that’s one less connection to the past that has been severed.



Here’s where the problem lies: I didn’t watch tv, my kids did. I didn’t use the home phone and neither did my children. All of us used the internet connection. No biggie, we get 3g service on our androids. THE PROBLEM IS I NEVER KNOW WHAT THE FLIPPEN TIME IS. The cable company picked up our boxes the other day. Over years and years of the boxes being in the same spot I had trained myself to look to them to check the time. While I’m getting ready for work, peek around the bathroom door to see how late I am VIA THE CLOCK ON THE CABLE BOX. In the middle of the night when I’ve woke up way to soon and often from having a really sucky or scary dream, THANK GOD THE CABLE BOX WAS THERE SHINING THROUGH THE DARK TO LET ME KNOW HOW MUCH LONGER BEFORE MORNING.

This Day…

This day will never happen again…


This is true for everyday. Maybe posting something about the good days will help me remember how blessed my family and myself truely are.
After all, its always easy to remember the crappy days. The key is… to help myself remember, and focus on more of the good days.

May 16, 2011
This day will never happen again…
Today was the first time I worked with my father. It was hard work, but not to hard. It was also very much of a relief that my dad got the contract to do the job. We have both been in need of work for quit some time. Granted, our individual circumstances for being in a “work drought” are vastly different, it matters little when work presents itself.
He’s pretty easy to work for. As a laid back and easy going guy, hard work just doesn’t seem as hard as it could be. More importantly, I had the great fortune to see my dad smile more than he has in a while. He thought he would get me back for all the times I’ve taken pictures of him. Often sneak snapshots of him doing silly stuff, like the day I was fortunate enough to have my camera ready, just in time to catch him doing a dorky dance while leaving the pool house and on the way around the pool to where we were all sitting. He was trying to make us laugh. We did. Then I was able to make him cringe with a sneak snapshot.
So, guess who was the pic taker today….



On the long drive back from pawleys island this is the picture message I got. Ugh, he got me! No, I wasn’t doing a dumb dance, I was doing “BOY” work. Ugh, double ugh. Oh the humility of femininity demished and caught on film. I’m gonna wear extra lipgloss today, lol, to recuperate.

750 Words

So, another sleepless night has found me tripping from site to site. I tripped over one that was awesome enough to share.

http://750words.com/

For anyone who loves or loathes writing, you must check out this site. The writing analysis is pretty awesome. I’m thinking I might cps (copy,paste,send) some of my previous blog posts just to see how its weighted.

So True!

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I thought this was pretty accurate. Ugh!

Awesome Moments

I just love the 1000awesomethings blog. I think I’ll start my own list. My search for lifes awesome moments are sure to be little treasures as each are discovered. Likewise, I can only hope for some long term “positive outlook” benefits.

In the mean time, anyone interested in lifes “SCHWEEEEET” lil moments, you can check out 1000Awesomethings website at:

http://1000awesomethings.com/

Though I’ve read many of this sites awesome things, I figured I would share the one that inspired me to start my own list of LIFES AWESOME MOMENTS!

http://1000awesomethings.com/2011/04/28/256-when-the-bass-kicks-in/