1. Sharing my bed. I loved laying next to my husband listening to the rhythmic sound of his breathing. I loved cuddling close when I was chilly. And I loved the smell and feel of his soft clean skin. My bed is cold and lonely now. I still sleep on my side. I fear my moving over would serve to remind me of how cold and empty that once warm spot has become.
2. Having a routine. For the past ten years our family has had something of a routine, whether it was shows we liked to watch together or traditions we strived to cultivate. I haven’t watched tv in over a year and I just remembered today that easter is just around the corner. Panic has set in.
3. Wearing my wedding rings. They truely were beautiful and I always felt a sense of pride wearing them. Because they’re platinum, I notice the absence of their weight as well as the constant adjusting the diamonds from off to the side, where the heaviness of the diamonds would fall in a failed attempt to resist gravitys relentless pull, back to a centered position.